N5 Topics
L10: Give and Take
Talk about giving and taking, and learn about social in and out groups
Give and Take
In this Topic, we're going to learn about three very important verbs which are all to do with giving and receiving. With these words, the direction and relationship is the important thing. These concepts are the backbone of polite speech and are essential for understanding more advanced Japanese.
Grammar in this Topic
あげる
To give (away), To present, To provide
あげる is a verb with many uses in Japanese. It's original meaning is 'to raise', but is also used as a polite speech way of saying 'to give'. In this way it can be thought of as similar to 'to offer up' in English. As polite speech has the same basic subject and object rules as standard speech, the giver will be marked with は or が, while the recipient will be marked with に. As usual, the 'object' that is being given will be marked with を.
From these three examples, we can see that the order of 'giver', 'recipient', and 'object' does not matter, so long as the correct particles are used.
Caution
あげる should not be used when giving something to someone of a higher status, or when lowering oneself to elevate another. This is done through honorific language, or humble speech, and will use different verbs.
Fun Fact
Although あげる is considered polite speech, it is the most natural way of saying 'to give'. やる is the 'casual' equivalent of あげる, but due to やる sounding a little bit rough, あげる became the standard.
くれる
To give (me), To be given
くれる is generally taught as part of a set of 3 verbs that are regularly used for giving and receiving in Japanese. These verbs are くれる, あげる, and もらう. くれる means 'to give' (to you, or someone that is part of your 'in' group).
With くれる and あげる, they both function in the regular way you would expect (regarding particles). This means that が will always mark the giver (the person performing the action), and に will mark the recipient (the person that is the 'destination' of the thing that is given). This means that を will be used to mark the 'object' that is given, as is usually the case.
The giver/recipient are often omitted from sentences with くれる, as one/both are usually obvious from context, or the sentence may be focusing on the object.
As can be seen here, the same nuance is kept, even when things are omitted.
Fun Fact
What someone considers their 'in' group will be different for each person, but usually consists of members of your family, clubs that you are in, or something similar that has a 'group' atmosphere (that you are a part of).
The giver will always be someone that is more distant than the people that are in the 'group'.
Caution
When we want to say that we (or someone else) gave something to someone that is not in our 'in' group, we will need to use あげる instead.
もらう
To receive, To get, To obtain
もらう is the 3rd verb that is regularly taught together with くれる, and あげる. It is used to highlight that (A) is 'received' by someone. However, unlike くれる and あげる (which are used to highlight that something is 'given'), もらう requires the に particle (or から) to mark the giver, not the recipient. が or は may be used to mark the recipient, as they are the one performing the action of receiving. を will mark the object that is being given.
In the second sentence we can see that the recipient has been omitted, while in the third example, the giver was omitted. This is a regular occurrence when using もらう, as the receiver is usually obvious, or the 'giver' may not be important to the overall meaning of the sentence.
In this example, the thing that was given is the focus, while the speaker does not consider the 'giver' something that needs to be mentioned. Sometimes, for very simple sentences with clear context, neither the 'giver', nor the 'receiver' needs to be mentioned.
Details
Within the three words in this Topic are the Japanese concepts of inside and outside groups. Also, the に particle is used in a way that can seem contradictory to some people when first learning about these words. Let's explore this further.
Are You In or Are You Out?
The idea of an in and out group is something that sits behind some Japanese words and grammar. In Japanese, the out group is called そと and the in group is called うち.
Who or what is in the in and out group is relative. It is relative to things like family relationships, age, what company someone works for, what school someone has attended, the social standing of someone, and so on. As it is relative, someone who is in the in group (うち) in one situation may be in the out group (そと) in another.
The simplest group is always the individual (with everyone else in the world being the out group!).
We can think of the そと and うち concepts as being linked to the Japanese system of deixis (a language’s world view). We can see this through the こそあど system. For example, こ words can apply to anyone in your in group, with そ words corresponding to the person or people you're speaking to, and あ words corresponding to people outside of both groups (often deliberately excluded).
In N4, we will learn more about the Japanese system of polite language, where the concepts of in and out groups become even more important.
...Until I Took An Arrow To The に
When first learning about あげる, くれる, and もらう, it can sometimes be confusing as to what particle to use. This is especially true in the case of に.
We have so far learned about に in terms of it showing some purpose or destination. While this is absolutely true, we can more broadly think of it as defining a specific pin-pointed ‘point of contact’. This is how it works with the giving and receiving verbs in this Topic.
に pin-points the secondary person or party involved in an action, such as the target you are giving something to, or the source you are receiving something from. We can compare this to the 'direct object' (often shortened to just 'object'), which is the thing being directly acted upon, normally marked by を.
In English, this secondary person can be used with lots of different words depending on the context, such as ‘to’, ‘by’, ‘from’, and so on. In Japanese, these are all condensed into に. This is what allows for に to mark both the recipient and the giver, depending on the context. It is pointing something out, defining a point of contact or reference, whether things flow 'to' or 'from' this point is then secondary. The verb tells us the direction!
It is actually not too important to remember the exact grammatical details here. Just focusing on that に is used in versatile ways, yet maintains a core meaning, is the important part.
We will see more structures which help reveal the meaning and uses of に in greater depth in N4 (especially when we learn about the passive!).
Dad's Birthday Presents
--:--
さな：「もう直ぐ正月でしょ？」
お母さん：「そうだね！」
たくや：「お父さん、今年は何日からお休みなの？」
お母さん：「二十三日から一月十日まで休みだよ！」
さな：「じゃあ誕生日も休みだね！去年と一昨年はお父さんが仕事だったよね？」
たくや：「そう。だから誕生日の日はお父さんにプレゼントだけあげたよね。」
お母さん：「そうそう。今年は何をあげる？」
さな：「お父さんは私に服をくれたから、私も服をあげるよ。」
たくや：「僕はまだ決めてない。」
さな：「お母さんはこの頃、毎年いいワインをあげるよね。」
お母さん：「うん。今年もワインをあげるよ。」
たくや：「僕もお父さんにゲームをもらったから、ゲームにする。」